When does it actually become an eating disorder?
I think it would be an impossible task to find someone with a 100% completely healthy relationship with food. People with “generally healthy” relationships with food certainly exist but not without some bias or unfair standards of themselves, but none of us make it out unscathed. Perceptions of “good and bad foods” are too deeply ingrained into our society that even if you had parents who were the most educated on how to talk about food, your friends, elders, TV commercials, social media, and marketing strategies have all imprinted an opinion of food onto you.
We have all heard that “food is fuel” but how is that supposed to be accounted for when your number one coping skill after a bad day is stopping by your favorite fast food spot? We have started to hear “There are no bad foods, just eat in moderation!” but how are you supposed to learn moderation when the the main recipes you find after googling “healthy dinner recipes” are green smoothies and salads? We make the argument that things such as nutrition and diet should be learned at home but our mothers and fathers are battling with their own lack of education and food shame to be able to provide it to us.
So, you grew up with your parent or grandparent consistently making comments about your body, watching TV shows that shamed the overweight kid and demonized sweets, and constantly comparing yourself to your friends. Flash forward to modern times - now you feel like crap because you’re trying your 5th new diet under the guise of a healthy lifestyle, you can only have dessert on the weekends, and often you’re eating food you hate for the sake of losing weight. Do you have poor body image, do you engage in disordered eating? Or do you actually have an eating disorder? Let’s talk about it.
The DSM-5, which is the manual for diagnosable psychiatric disorders talks about anorexia, bulimia, binge eating, ARFID, PICA, and rumination disorder. The first three are the ones this post will focus on simply because their symptoms are the ones we most likely see. The overall description of the first three diagnoses is certain behaviors (throwing up, severe restriction, severe over-eating, and excessive exercise) that are triggered specifically by distressing thoughts and emotions around food. Overall, not a bad definition but definitely leaves out a lot of the experience of having an eating disorder. That definition doesn’t talk about the symptoms of religious calorie counting, nonstop thoughts about your next meal, your mood for the day based on the number on a scale, poor body image, or using food/restriction to regulate emotions.
All that to say, I would likely talk to you about an eating disorder long before the DSM-5 would. I think it’s wonderful to make attempts at having a healthy body and sometimes we can do that without making a few mistakes first. However, when our idea of health involves punishments, restrictions, hiding food wrappers, and burning off a few cookies, we have to dissect your definition of health. You may be thinking, “I do see some disordered eating habits but I’m definitely not making myself throw up or not eat all day.” You may also find that comforting. However, if you do relate to even just a few of the behaviors and thoughts I’ve listed, I’m here to tell you those behaviors get worse, not better when they go unchecked.
A generally healthy relationship with food is attainable for anyone, despite their starting point or background. It takes a lot of intentional work and more than likely a deep dive into your childhood, your self-worth, body image, and how you treat yourself in other areas of life. While we may struggle in one major area in life, it always bleeds into others which can give us some insight into what is going on at our core.
Want to talk more about disordered eating, body image, self-worth, and everything else? Check out my website to schedule a free 15-minute consultation to see how I can help.
Stephanie Townsend, LMSW, CCTP, ART Practitioner
